Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Points of Light and Everyday Life

What was the most interesting thing about my day today? That's hard to say, there's just so much to choose from: there's being at work and checking emails, assigning dockets, answering really stupid questions on the phone; being late for work as usual, not taking a lunch break, having a pounding headache....

Today, like a lot of days, was pretty much boring, boring, boring. I would have to say the highlight of my day was having Japanese take-out for dinner, though I didn't have much of an appetite, and making this playlist for my blog.

It's strange. My life is like a movie (a really odd, boring, pointless movie). The moments that I spend outside of myself, the movie is on play: I feel kind of okay, I may even be having fun (something I'm trying to have more of lately), but as soon as the event stops, I slip back inside myself and the movie is on pause, and I'm left holding the remote control, unable to do anything but stare blankly at the unmoving image on the screen.

I don't know if I'm making any sense. But lately I've been having brief moments where I feel okay, and you would think these moments would break apart and start to infiltrate my everyday life, but they don't. They're still just isolated points of light.

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