Melancholia

Melancholia

Friday, July 9, 2010

Weekend Anxiety

So the weekend is here (it's less than an hour to closing time) and I still don't know what I'm doing tonight. I feel I should go out but I don't really want to, and I feel like I have to go out because there's a certain someone whom I live with that I really don't want to spend time with this weekend. Soon I will have an anxiety-ridden meltdown.

I can a)go to an OK Go concert tonight with people I barely know, if there are still tickets available like they were last night, b) go bar-hopping all over the avenue to check out a bunch of mini-concerts, but by myself, or c)spend a miserable evening at home trying to avoid talking about why I'm in such a pissy mood.

I'm so tired right now, and I have a headache, I really just want to sleep it off. But I'm pretty sure that's out of the question.

Everyone I know is either camping this weekend, or is involved in the infamous and oh-so-cliche bachelor party shenanigans. Of course, if I had more friends, (real friends, not co-worker friends or friends-with-my-boyfriend-friends) then I wouldn't be having this dilemna right now.

I think maybe that's my attraction to drummer boy. I want a real friend. All my own. And he is sweet. And obviously caring. He's a music-lover. And a musician. And I just want him to make me feel better. Is that pathetic? He is going to this concert tonight. He's going with a bunch of his friends, and it just sort of came up last minute on Facebook last night. Now I'm not sure I will be comfortable hanging out with just him and his friends. I will feel like an intruder. Like I'm imposing myself. (Would that make me an imposter?)

And to top it all off, I have nothing to wear. Seriously. I need to go shopping. But I'm afraid there won't be time.

Why do weekends have to be so complicated?

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